What irritates you most about your partner?

I bet you can answer without batting an eye.

If you’ve been in your relationship for any length of time, it’s only natural that you’d have some frustrations. Being intimately entwined with another human being creates friction. Plus our brains are wired to focus on the negative as a survival mechanism.

A securely attached partnership starts with a deeply connected relationship to yourself.

You’ve got to prioritize true self care, and that means getting to know your inner world and tending to your spirit with love and compassion.

Too often we put our partners, and sometimes everyone else first.

If you're wondering what the heck I'm talking about, it’s the digital addiction epidemic that’s damaging our relationships in daily micro interactions. I’m referring to the phubbing phenomenon—ignoring your partner for your cell phone, or vice versa—that can have long-term consequences on your relationship.

Have you ever wondered why even the tiniest most insignificant things can lead you into intense arguments or painful spirals of disconnection?

I often hear from couples that they’re baffled by how bad things got between them when the original issue was a big nothing burger— something that didn’t really matter much to either of them— such as what shape to cut the baby’s carrots, turning left when the restaurant was actually on the right, and leaving a half-eaten bowl of Ben and Jerry’s on the kitchen counter next to the sink rather than in it.

If you’re anything like me or the many women I work with, then one of the things you long for most from your partner is to be heard. There’s nothing like the connection that surges between you when the person you love looks you in the eye and says, I get it. Yet these simple but powerful bonding moments can remain maddeningly elusive…